Whore: a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

It’s Wednesday night & I had a pretty rough day. Thankfully all my tests came back fine & the cardiologist said there was nothing wrong with me, he tells me this while my heart is about to thump out of my chest, probably due to the fact I was filling out the paperwork for my Short sale. I think it’s safe to say now that I am suffering from stress & anxiety. In any case, the ex husband calls. He has been out of town for about a week now & wants to know if his kids are coming over this weekend. I tell him Josh said yes but Sam hasn’t said anything. He then starts in again about how Sam hasn’t came over since Thanksgiving & I ask him if he wants to talk to Sam. He then says ‘It doesn’t do any good for me to talk to him, you need to talk to him.’ I have heard this crap way too many times and I am not in the mood to deal with his crap right now.

Poor Sam is standing in the kitchen & I ask are you going to your dads this weekend? He says, no I have plans. I say what about next week & he says I guess I can go then. I then proceed to yell into the phone ‘There your kid is coming over next weekend! I did your parenting duty for you, are you happy now???’ and he hangs up on me. I usually get angry when he hangs up on me but I really just didn’t care.

The next day he sends me a txt msg saying ‘whats going on w/ u why were u so mean 2 me cursing I didn’t do that 2 u’. I ignored the message and went on about my day with no problems and started to actually feel better. Friday afternoon rolls around and I ask Josh if he has heard from his dad? He says, ‘Yeah he wanted to know if you were going to take me over there or if he had to pick me up because he has been gone all day.’ Same old story, I drive 20 miles one way home & I’m expected to take the kid all the way to his house in Narnia. I decided to reset my attitude & tell Josh I would take him, after all, hes not who I am mad at.

On the way there we have a nice little conversation about our upcoming vacation to Orlando and all the stuff we were going to do. We pull up at the ex’s house & Josh asks me to walk him to the house. I get out & down the driveway here comes the ex with some lawn dart game and tells me to take it home. I say why would I do that? He says, ‘It’s been here for 6 months & he hasn’t played it. If you don’t want it throw it away!’ I say fine & sit it down on the driveway.

He then asks me what my problem is. When I told him a few weeks ago I had to go for a stress test he acted stupid and said ‘Why do you need that, your not under any stress?’ and he was dead serious. I choose not to go into my personal issues with him because the less he knows about my life the better I like it.

I then say ‘Every couple of months you play this crap where I have to talk to Sam for you and I do and convince the kid to come over here & then I get messages from him saying dad left us here 2 hours ago to go look at a car, can you come get us?’ He of course get defensive and tries to talk over me like he always does. I then say the reason he hasn’t been over since Thanksgiving is because you treat him like your do-bitch the whole time & mention 1 reference & he cuts me off again. He then yells ‘I guess I’m not supposed to make him do anything and act like you & let him sit on the couch playing video games all day while I do it all!’ I say ‘Excuse me’ and he cuts me off again. Then he says ‘The problem is you let him do what he wants instead of treating him like a child and making him come over here!’ I say ‘The boy is almost 17 & I am trying to teach him to be an adult and make his own decisions’ and I get cut off again. He then yells ‘The problem is you need to start acting like a mom instead of going out being a whore!’

Now….I can honestly say I have no clue whatsoever where that came from but it’s not the first time he has accused me of something I was innocent of. A few years ago he accused me of going out to the bars every weekend in front of my boys because I wouldn’t take a bunch of rolled change for the pizza I picked up for him & they stood there & went ‘OOOOOOoooo!!!!’ I’ve been accused of all sorts of stuff by him but this one I didn’t expect.

The fact that he said this in front of my son is what truly pissed me off, I could honestly care less what he personally thinks of me. Because of my level of stress & aggravation I was not going to let this one go for some reason, I couldn’t have controlled myself if I had wanted to. I won’t go into all the dirty details of what was said, mostly because I can’t remember half of what was said & I want to save some surprises for the Lifetime movie they will one day make about me. I can tell you that he called me a whore at least 5 more times and accused me of sleeping with all the guys I worked with.

I was accused of a few more things that made absolutely no sense & I finally looked at him and said ‘I am done with you.’ And I walked off down the driveway to leave. I walked past the dart game and got in my car & was leaving. As I pull onto the main road I see him walking down the driveway, my son behind him and he shoots me a bird. I know, I know, it’s just a gesture but this man thinks he is truly holier than tho and does no wrong. I wanted to know why the hell he felt it necessary to shoot me a bird!

I slammed on the brakes and back up all the way back onto his road & in front of his driveway. Thank God there was nobody coming down the main road or I would have been toast, not my smartest move and I admit that. I go to get out of my car to ask him what his problem was & he throws the dart game at my Jeep. The board made of PVC & nylon flew over the top along with one of the rubber darts that landed in the neighbors yard. One bounced off the side of the Jeep & the third stuck to my hood. As I see the board fly by I pick it up and look at the neighbor standing in her yard with 2 little kids and say ‘You saw this.’ I pick up the dart board and look at him and say ‘I hope you have a good lawyer!’ He walks off & I pick up the 2 darts on the ground. I then apologize to the lady and the 2 kids for having to see that & throw the stuff in the back seat and leave.

I drive off and burst into tears. I end up pulling over at the play ground and calling his niece, one of the few people I can talk to about such things and I just dump everything on her. I also in the process get out and remove the dart from the hood of my car & throw it in the back seat. I finally calm down enough and drive home. I hate the fact that I let him get to me but I am obviously very weak mentally now and he knows how to push my buttons.

Sam comes home a little while later & takes one look at me and wants to know what was wrong. Even now I hesitate to tell him what happened because it’s still his dad. I gave him the small details and he is miffed. At this point I keep pondering the idea of calling the cops since he did throw something at my car but, I really don’t want any more drama. I end up telling a friend about the incident & tell him one day the ex will be dead and I will be happy and then I will have sex on top of his grave.

The next day I decide to call the police at least just so there is some documentation to go along with what I have been keeping on my own. They come out & basically say there’s not a whole lot they can do but encourage me to keep my own documentation. The nice officer also offered me some other advice as well & said that I don’t have to make my 16 year old son go to his dads regardless of if he pays child support or not.

I tried to make the most of my Saturday & went shopping with my mom & had lunch with my daughter. In my alone time I had a mini pity party & actually contemplated ‘IF’ I really were a whore. As sad as it sounds I asked my son who is mature beyond his 16 years and he said no mom you’re not.

Josh finally made it home in the rain about 7 that evening and I couldn’t have been happier to see him. After a little chit chat I asked him about his dad. I asked if his dad had said anything after he threw the dart game at my car & he says no the only thing he said after that was ‘Women’. I then say the only reason I even came back was because he shot a bird & Josh gets a funny look & says well he did say something that time and looks down. He looks over at his brother and I ask if he just wants to tell Sam and not me but he decides to tell us both. My poor baby tells me ‘He flicked you off and said Mo fo B hoe.’ He called me a mother fucking bitch whore in front of my 10 year old. I have never felt so sorry for my kids before. Josh says don’t worry, he’s wrong & smiles.

I start to feel better & make dinner then I am asked to the movies. I ask my boys do you guys mind if I go out tonight or do you want me to stay home. They look at each other and say go ahead, have fun. As I am getting ready to leave I walk into the man cave where they are playing video games and tell them goodbye. My 16 year old looks at me and says, ‘Bye mom, have fun being a whore!’ and they both bust out laughing. They might be rotten kids but they are mine.